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LOOKING GREAT FOR THE WORLD CUP !
Get your free wall chart inside
and.... EVENmore areas
covered
Cabo Roig, Punta Prima & Playa Flamenca
The
HELLO, GOOD READING...& WELCOME TO...
plus More ITV CHANGESBuying a house in SpainINTERNATIONAL WILLS
GRAN ALACANT- SANTA POLA - LA MARINA - GUARDAMAR - ROJALESCATRAL - ALBATERA - HONDONS - LA ROMANA & PINOSO
www.thejungledrums.com JUNE 2010 Nº 72
FOR THE LOCALS BY THE LOCALS
and much much more!
this month4/5 HAVE YOU GOT CRABS?Buying local fresh fish
9 ANDREA BURNS... International Wills
11 LIVING THE LIFE...Life as an expat
13 ASK THE LAWYER...Buying & Selling a house
17 NATURE...Tele-Birding
18/19 LIFE ON AN URB...Goings on in Urban life
21 HEALTH CARE IN SPAIN... Cover up!
25 WHAT’S ON...? Get out & about
27-31FREE WORLDCUP CHART
33-39 FUN FUN FUN... Jokes and er...more jokes
41 MOTORING...ITV changes
43 COMPUTERS...Flickr 41 THE TROUBLE WITH SPAIN... Sport
49 PUZZLES...Sooooo easy...
51 HOROSCOPES...Stars in your eyes
55 BUSINESS DIRECTORY... All the businesses you’ll need!
LIKE WHAT YOU SEE? take a look at www.loadofbull.es
where you’ll find some of the stuff we couldn’t, wouldn’t, or shouldn’t publish...
I got invited out the other night…by a lovely Spanish woman no
less. A phone call from her and ten minutes later I was showered,
changed and ready to go.
Half an hour later we met in town and went for an aperitif in a
quiet bar before moving on to the restaurant - I’d booked it earlier,
in-between the shower and getting dressed – and it was here that
we bumped into a couple of her friends. Three hours later and with
several other friends and various members of her extended family
in tow – and a few more bars patronised - we were within spitting
distance of the restaurant. The same restaurant where I’d reserved
a table in readiness for a cosy meal for two…and we should have
been there two hours previously. But, as usual, when I’m out with
a beautiful woman...I was not using my brain to do the thinking
and had left the restaurant number at home, so it was a case of
pacifying the owner when we eventually got there.
We got there at just after midnight. All fourteen of us. And, as ever
in Spain, the owner didn’t bat an eyelid when asked to make room
for another dozen people at the cosy corner table…how romantic.
After another two and a half hours of eating and drinking and more
eating, only interrupted by the Spanish family members asking
(shouting) me questions – all at once, and the end was in sight – the
restaurant was shutting. I got out, stuffed with the finest seafood
and the cheapest wine, and with a back looking (and feeling) as if
it was severely sunburnt after the whole lot of ‘em had slapped me
as an affectionate way of saying goodbye. I remember the soccer
riots of the eighties and I got slapped more gently by gorilla-shaped
Arsenal fans back then than I did on this night.
But it was the end, and I could go home. Six hours, enough food to
make Pat Butcher smile, and
enough liquid to test the
fittest bladder and it was
over…and there was me
earlier in the evening just
hoping for a quick nibble…
Also this month I had a rude
awakening when I jumped out
of my skin one night as I took
the rubbish out and lifted the lid
of the big grey bin to discover a Moro
grinning at me (toothless) from the inside
(with a miners torch on his head). After a
quick ‘hola’ he was back to it – head down, and rummaging, - so
I turned my attention to the adjacent bin, where a lot of noise was
coming from, to find his wife, scouring the bags for her particular
brand of treasure…and another toothless smile – complemented
with a cheery ‘Buenos Noches’ then she was back to it… I love
Spain…
Here’s a little gem I heard the other day about Ryanair…apparently
Michael O’Leary walked into a Dublin bar and ordered a pint of
Guinness, to which the barmen replied, ‘that’ll be 50 cents please.’
O’Leary, not believing his luck, said ‘My, that’s mighty cheap,’ to
which the barmen replied….’Oh….were you wanting a glass with
that…?’
If only eh…? Read on..and enjoy, Dave
&Independent Conveyancing
Wills, Probate & Inheritance
Tax Advisors, Chartered Accountants & Surveyors
Defective & Illegal Construction Claims
Vehicle and Drivers Licence / Traffic Registration
Litigation In All Law Fields
PEACE OF MIND FOR YOU AND YOUR FUTURE
Plaza Calvo Sotelo 1(Below the British Consulate)
ALICANTE
Cantral plaza 30HONDON DE LAS NIEVES
C/ Libertad 18 FORTUNA
Av.de Madrid 60 PETRER
FRONT COVER
Danielle Wright, 21 - model from GA & the pretty face of Jungle Drums,
and Sandra Claderon Molina, 19 - Santa Pola’s Fiesta Queen, cheer on our teams.
3
HAVE YOU GOT CRABS ?...and fresh Santa Pola crabs at that – the best crustaceans around (apart from a bowls team I saw last week…they were good) and seriously good food. Good for your health, good to taste and, possibly more important at the moment, good for your pocket. However, this isn’t a story just about crabs - that would be shellfish (geddit?) – what we’ve put together this month is a guide to buying your seafood, seeing as most of you reading this will live within a reasonably short drive from Santa Pola- the Mediterranean’s most important fishing port.We’ve all heard the story of the loaves and the fishes where more than five thousand people were miraculously fed, with just five loaves and two fishes. If that was to happen today…and my mum could do it, she seems to be able to feed as many people as will show up - and the cupboards remain full. But put the loaves and fishes story into a modern context and we’d probably just make a load of fish finger sand-wiches. that’s what this article is about too really - the benefits of eating fresh fish, as opposed to a reconstituted mash in a burger bar called a ‘Sea-man’s Slice’ or something, are enor-mous. Fish has oils in it that promotes healthy functioning of the brain and heart and seafood is also generally low in fat and high in other important nutrients includ-ing Omega 3 - which I thought was a film with Michael Caine ‘til I wrote this. So, apart from being one of the cheap-est and healthiest forms of food, fresh seafood is also very easy to buy around here, and as I said earlier, especially in Santa Pola. In this town which relies heavily on the one hundred strong
fishing fleet that spend six days of the week at sea, we have an abundance of places to buy fresh – and I mean ‘that day fresh’ – including most of the large supermarket chains that are represented in the area. However, it stands to reason doesn’t it, that the closer you are to the town, the fresher your seafood will be. And within the town? It’s more than likely that it is just a few short hours since your chosen meal was swimming around wondering what was for dinner…and then realising…it was. That’s how fresh it is. At the MERCADILLO in the centre of town you’ll find that day’s (or the previous depending on times) dis-played so that you can see the whole of the fish. Santapoleros know their fish and the vendors know what the locals want…good fish and they will soon let the vendor know should the produce not come up to standard. Take a walk along the port in the evening and you’ll come across the small cabins lo-cated behind the town hall. Here you’ll browse the seafood of the day which is, once again, laid out (pardon the pun) in readiness for the local house-wives who will be along to natter, buy, natter a bit more and argue about the price, before bidding the vendor a fond farewell…until tomorrow.Mediterranean people live longer than the rest of us (a miracle if you’ve seen them drive) and those in the know tell us that it is not least because of their diet of seafood. The fact that they can smoke about 50,000 fags (each) every day and still curl their toes up years after us just endorses the argument, so if you don’t normally buy fresh fish, try it – you may be surprised. It’s simple to cook (we’ll give you some ideas next month) and just as cheap as buying a slab of Salmon with three eyes from
Buyeckistan or the like, and far tastier…unless eyes are your thing I suppose. A walk along the prom, a cool beer and then buy your dinner. A little olive oil and garlic along with the fish in the pan – and you have it…delicious, trust me.
There is a lad here who has five barley loaves and two small fish, but what are they among so many?" JOHN 6:9 (NKJV)
Tips for Buying Fresh Whole FishFull, clear, bright eyes.Bright red or pink, clean gills.Fresh, mild odour.Shiny, brightly coloured skin with tightly adhering scales.Firm flesh, elastic to the touch, clinging tightly to the bones.
Tips for buying live crabs, lobsters, and shrimp1. Legs should be lively when touched unless the crustacean is soft-shelled (such as soft shell crabs).
2. The tail of a live lobster should curl under when lifted up. It should not hang limp.3. Shellfish should feel weighty, not light or dry.4. Raw shrimp should have translucent shells with a greyish green, a pinkish-tan, or a pink tint. They should be moist and firm, not mushy.
Tips for buying live clams, mussels, oysters, scallops, and other molluscs1. Shells should be tightly closed. If they are open, they should shut immedi-ately when gently tapped. Discard
gaping shells that do not close when tapped.2. Shells should be moist and intact, not cracked, dry or chipped.3. Molluscs should have a clean ocean-fresh scent, not a fishy odour.
Tips for Buying Fresh Fillets and SteaksGlossy and freshly-cut appearance, firm texture.No signs of browning or drying around cut edges.No discoloration.
HAVE YOU GOT CRABS?
"Only the best for the Captain's table", CAP’N BIRDSEYE 1983
If not you should have
4 STILL the cheapest advertising around- TEL. 606 540 408
HAVE YOU GOT CRABS ?...and fresh Santa Pola crabs at that – the best crustaceans around (apart from a bowls team I saw last week…they were good) and seriously good food. Good for your health, good to taste and, possibly more important at the moment, good for your pocket. However, this isn’t a story just about crabs - that would be shellfish (geddit?) – what we’ve put together this month is a guide to buying your seafood, seeing as most of you reading this will live within a reasonably short drive from Santa Pola- the Mediterranean’s most important fishing port.We’ve all heard the story of the loaves and the fishes where more than five thousand people were miraculously fed, with just five loaves and two fishes. If that was to happen today…and my mum could do it, she seems to be able to feed as many people as will show up - and the cupboards remain full. But put the loaves and fishes story into a modern context and we’d probably just make a load of fish finger sand-wiches. that’s what this article is about too really - the benefits of eating fresh fish, as opposed to a reconstituted mash in a burger bar called a ‘Sea-man’s Slice’ or something, are enor-mous. Fish has oils in it that promotes healthy functioning of the brain and heart and seafood is also generally low in fat and high in other important nutrients includ-ing Omega 3 - which I thought was a film with Michael Caine ‘til I wrote this. So, apart from being one of the cheap-est and healthiest forms of food, fresh seafood is also very easy to buy around here, and as I said earlier, especially in Santa Pola. In this town which relies heavily on the one hundred strong
fishing fleet that spend six days of the week at sea, we have an abundance of places to buy fresh – and I mean ‘that day fresh’ – including most of the large supermarket chains that are represented in the area. However, it stands to reason doesn’t it, that the closer you are to the town, the fresher your seafood will be. And within the town? It’s more than likely that it is just a few short hours since your chosen meal was swimming around wondering what was for dinner…and then realising…it was. That’s how fresh it is. At the MERCADILLO in the centre of town you’ll find that day’s (or the previous depending on times) dis-played so that you can see the whole of the fish. Santapoleros know their fish and the vendors know what the locals want…good fish and they will soon let the vendor know should the produce not come up to standard. Take a walk along the port in the evening and you’ll come across the small cabins lo-cated behind the town hall. Here you’ll browse the seafood of the day which is, once again, laid out (pardon the pun) in readiness for the local house-wives who will be along to natter, buy, natter a bit more and argue about the price, before bidding the vendor a fond farewell…until tomorrow.Mediterranean people live longer than the rest of us (a miracle if you’ve seen them drive) and those in the know tell us that it is not least because of their diet of seafood. The fact that they can smoke about 50,000 fags (each) every day and still curl their toes up years after us just endorses the argument, so if you don’t normally buy fresh fish, try it – you may be surprised. It’s simple to cook (we’ll give you some ideas next month) and just as cheap as buying a slab of Salmon with three eyes from
Buyeckistan or the like, and far tastier…unless eyes are your thing I suppose. A walk along the prom, a cool beer and then buy your dinner. A little olive oil and garlic along with the fish in the pan – and you have it…delicious, trust me.
There is a lad here who has five barley loaves and two small fish, but what are they among so many?" JOHN 6:9 (NKJV)
Tips for Buying Fresh Whole FishFull, clear, bright eyes.Bright red or pink, clean gills.Fresh, mild odour.Shiny, brightly coloured skin with tightly adhering scales.Firm flesh, elastic to the touch, clinging tightly to the bones.
Tips for buying live crabs, lobsters, and shrimp1. Legs should be lively when touched unless the crustacean is soft-shelled (such as soft shell crabs).
2. The tail of a live lobster should curl under when lifted up. It should not hang limp.3. Shellfish should feel weighty, not light or dry.4. Raw shrimp should have translucent shells with a greyish green, a pinkish-tan, or a pink tint. They should be moist and firm, not mushy.
Tips for buying live clams, mussels, oysters, scallops, and other molluscs1. Shells should be tightly closed. If they are open, they should shut immedi-ately when gently tapped. Discard
gaping shells that do not close when tapped.2. Shells should be moist and intact, not cracked, dry or chipped.3. Molluscs should have a clean ocean-fresh scent, not a fishy odour.
Tips for Buying Fresh Fillets and SteaksGlossy and freshly-cut appearance, firm texture.No signs of browning or drying around cut edges.No discoloration.
HAVE YOU GOT CRABS?
"Only the best for the Captain's table", CAP’N BIRDSEYE 1983
If not you should have
NEW LOW! LOW! ADVERTISING RATES - TEL. 606 540 408 5
6
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7
8 your local mag’ online and FREE!! - www.thejungledrums.com16 THE CHEAPEST ADVERTISING ON THE COSTA !!- TEL 606 540 40840 THE CHEAPEST ADVERTISING ON THE COSTA !!- TEL 606 540 408STILL the cheapest advertising around- TEL. 606 540 4088
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I have come across a copy of an “International Will” for Spanish assets. The clients were assured of it’s validity in Spain.
The information they were not given is the procedure necessary in order to have that kind of Last Will validated here in Spain.
In case you are wondering now whether or not you have such a will, if you have signed a Spanish will in front of a notary you’re fine. All Last Wills attested by a Spanish notary are registered and probate can be finalised with that Will.
The “International Will” I am talking about is not attested by a notary but simply signed by two witnesses. Since that type of will is not registered anywhere, it will have to pass the court, involving considerable expense to be paid in fees for a lawyer and attorney.
Apart from the increased budget required it will also extend the time-period for the probate.
If you happen to have made such a will I would advise you to make another one, properly attested by a Spanish notary. The extra expense right now will be far outweighed when probate is sought in the future.
Please contact me if you have any doubts or wish to seek clarification on your Last Will. You’ll find my contact details next to this article.
andrea burns
Tax &
Legal Services
SPANISH WILLS
NON-RES. CAPITAL GAINS TAX
NON-RESIDENTS’ INCOME TAX
FISCAL REPRESENTATION
RESIDENCE CERTIFICATES
N.I.E. NUMBERS
SPANISH PROBATE & INHERITANCES
CONVEYANCES
POWER OF ATTORNEY
URB. DON PUEBLO II BW 140GRAN ALACANT
96 669 7824 or 639 608 969
ANDREABURNS@ORANGE.ES
INTERNATIONAL WILLS FOR SPANISH ASSETS
Fiscal help...
Now as you may or may not know, i have lived
here 23 years so far and i have seen many
changes and many faces come and go over the
years. Some changes have been for the better
and some for the worse, whichever way you
want to interpret the meaning or the cause of
the changes. Ever being the optimist i would say
that some or most of the changes have been for
the better but on the other hand the pessimist
in yours truly throws up counter measures which
counter balance. Now i was originally attracted
by the openness of the beaches along Arenales
del Sol, and as for Guardamar and La Mata well
they were wonderful and open with lots of park-
ing areas and access to the beaches. Now? Well
you only have to take the beach road into Santa
Pola to see what i mean, then along came the
property boom and all the development along
with it which entailed building as close to the sea
as possible. The joke being that properties sold
as front line ended up having an apartment block
built in front of them with the all too familiar wall
and closed gates so no access was easily avail-
able. The occupants in these blocks regarding the
beach in front of them as a private beach with all
the snobbery that entailed, then in 1988 along
came the Ley de Costas which has helped to
resolve the issue regarding these developments.
Those of us around before this law used to say
they will be building on stilts in the sea before
long but thankfully this never arose, but we had
a laugh about it at the time. Now all this building
has allowed a lot of people to afford a holiday
or retirement home in the sun and good luck to
them and i do not begrudge them this small lux-
ury, in fact i quite like the idea of working class
people having this opportunity to own something
better than a beach hut at Clacton or Skegness.
It’s just the way the actual beach area has been
spoiled that i have some reservations about
because it has just spoilt it with all the build-
ing so close. Anyway that’s my gripe over with
for now unless something else rattles my cage
regarding this subject but i now want to discuss
other things that are closer or were closer and
of which i have fond regards. and that’s some of
the people i have known here in Spain over the
years who have either passed on to that great
beach paradise in the sky…but this sort of thing
i cannot write about too much because someone
always knows someone else, but yes i have seen
many come and go and lose a lot of money in the
process from the man running a fishing boat for
fishing trips to the man who tried to open a car
spares shop. Now the idea might have been ok
but the timing left a lot to be desired to say the
least, when not many of the urbanisations had
even been conceived on paper let alone built. Or
who were put out of business before they even
had a chance to get off the ground because in
them days - in the not so distant past - you had
to have a Spanish partner to start a business
here in Spain - before they joined the common
market fully.
I have heard of or encountered many of these
sorts of things over the 23 years of living here
from people meeting a local waiter called shall
we say Pepe who spoke a bit of English and offer
some of these people a dream come true buying
a bar in Spain and a new life. sending their local
Pepe a small fortune to buy the bar which was
duly done with their money all above board and
on the level till they had been here six months
only to arrive for work one day to find that the
bar had been sold by their so called business
partner and friend Pepe. Because the deeds (es-
critura) was bought in Pepe’s name only and once
he had a property developer or someone else in-
terested in a up and running successful bar it was
sold, also the car rental firm that had a Spanish
partner and was set up with a lot of one man’s
money only to be milked rotten by the Spanish
partner who was responsible for the buying and
selling of the cars because they spoke Spanish.
Even the wrecked cars were sold on paper for
peanuts only to be repaired and a nice drink out
of it for
someone
who shall
remain nameless.
And when a certain
mechanic used these
cars for repairs to the
existing fleet so that when
the man called Pepe came
to take away a car there
was only what was left of
a crunched body shell left
then the screaming
started. After that a
private local break-
down truck was
used so no-one in
the head office even
knew that a car was
written off - if it was
picked up before
they knew.
So the list goes on
from estate agents
with power of at-
torney to so called
property administra-
tors of urbanisations and the old favourite of a
Spanish fiscal representative which seems to
have died a death but the law was brought in
about 10 or so years ago as i remember and was
a prescription for certain fiscal representatives to
levy a non-existent tax on his customers and call
it a payment tax so he could buy a new boat or
another Mercedes car for his wife.
As stated i have lived here a long while now and
what i haven’t seen with my own eyes, I’ve heard
about from the bar room lawyers who seem to be
around everywhere, but i cannot say i have heard
them all yet…because i haven’t and something
new is always being talked about somewhere
along the coast.
World Cup fever is turning up in unexpected places this summer-non more so than 10 metres underwater in the Costa Blanca! The dive crew at Dive Academy Santa Pola are offering 1/2 price dives, discover scubas and snorkeling experiences within 48 hours of your team winning a game during this summer's World Cup finals. Owner and PADI Instructor Damon Rose explains; 'We were going to offer the 1/2 price promotion within 24 hours of your team win-ning it's game but then we figured people might be a bit worse for wear the follow-ing morning after an important match! Basically we are offering divers or people wanting to learn to dive or snorkel a chance to celebrate their teams victory with a great days fun.' England supporter Damon is quite prepared for his team putting him out of pocket for a month. 'Obviously, personally I'd like England to do well but that could mean
me giving away dozens of dive experiences to English tourists and expats if they go far in the tournament. Not forgetting Spain, Holland, Germany, Italy and France of course!' And who do Dive Academy expect to be giving away most 1/2 price dives to? 'Spain. I'd be very surprised if Spain didn't go very far'.
And what about a Spain vs. England final?; ' I'm not sure we could afford that! However we could have a divers penalty shoot out underwater complete with scuba gear and fins before the actual final itself!'
HE CAME, HE SAW….HE WON’T GO BACKCOLIN says his bit about life as an expat
You can lead a horse to water…but a pint is better!Local riders from El Palmera stables near Guardamar arrived at El Raso on horseback in May and en-joyed a cool beer…I suppose the horses ordered a red rum…?
ONE SHORT PLANK A quick note from the editor to the
lady(?) in the blue t-shirt who complained loudly at Oro y Sal cafeteria in Gran Alacant last month… that the menu was in Spanish – well spotted love…do
you want a lift to the airport…or you gonna walk? whichever– just go
away. pic. A miserable old fat cow.
Jim, Lisa, Julie and Gillian from La Palmera stables in Rojales
Me and Mrs. Jones
Not civil to the GuardiaBy BullyIt had all started so well. A sunny afternoon, me putting up a fence in the garden while Mrs Jones and Meg soaked up some rays. Then the Guardia turned up. At first it wasn’t clear what exactly I’d done wrong to deserve the presence of two officers of the crown at my gate, but here they were. Apparently someone had smashed into a car and left the scene pretty rapidly, forgetting to fill out the ac-cident form and disappearing into the distance. Apparently, that someone was me. Now at this point they asked to see my car, so I showed them. ‘No, the other car,’ said one of them with very bushy eyebrows (I actually wondered how he could see me but I bet they
are handy in the summer…). I offered the (honest) excuse that I didn’t have another but (apparently) I had ac-quired a BMW (black) with significant frontal damage. It didn’t matter what I said they insisted that I must have hidden it somewhere…all this was get-ting hard to take, especially with his eyebrows moving up and down as he talked. Eventually, they agreed to look at my ID and realised that my name, and the guy’s they were looking for, were completely different. At last, some common sense was going to prevail (I thought) but I was on another train of thought completely to eyebrows and his mate. My ID was false. It was checked, by phone, by radio all they failed to do was hold it up to my face and compare but they were not having it. Despite my protestations I was heading for the cooler (I know... but it’s the only way I can get my name in the same sentence as Steve McQueen…) and arrangements were made (by them) for me to be taken away.My knights in shining armour turned out to be the Local Police, who ar-rived in the nick (geddit?) of time and called me ‘Dave,’ I almost replied with an ‘I love you’ as eyebrows whipped his head between the two of us lost in the confusion. My friendly boys in blue began a serious sounding, although I
could only hear whispers, conversa-tion, about me. The looks over the shoulder from all the officers were still unnerving; especially eyebrows and I began to worry for my future once again. Stripy pyjamas are just not me, especially the ones with arrows on. Anyway, to keep a long story long, it turned out that I didn’t have a BMW, hadn’t crashed and legged it and I was, in fact, the bloke that it said I was. Bit like Ronseal really. So every-one was happy once again, although eyebrows and co’ didn’t offer an apol-ogy but they did shake my hand over the gate. It was that point that Mrs Jones decided to put in an appearance and put her front paws on the top of the gate – eyeballing eyebrows – and then it happened. To give him credit he took it well and returned to his car without another word. Mrs Jones, for her part, had let out the longest belch I’ve heard from any animal, let alone a Great Dane, into his face. It was compounded by the noise of her cheeks rattling against her gums from the force of the escaping air, and Eyebrows er, eyebrows being pushed against his forehead.I don’t expect Eyebrows to hold a grudge, but just in case, if anyone can bake a nice jam sponge, with a file in it…
10 ask@thejungledrums.com
Now as you may or may not know, i have lived
here 23 years so far and i have seen many
changes and many faces come and go over the
years. Some changes have been for the better
and some for the worse, whichever way you
want to interpret the meaning or the cause of
the changes. Ever being the optimist i would say
that some or most of the changes have been for
the better but on the other hand the pessimist
in yours truly throws up counter measures which
counter balance. Now i was originally attracted
by the openness of the beaches along Arenales
del Sol, and as for Guardamar and La Mata well
they were wonderful and open with lots of park-
ing areas and access to the beaches. Now? Well
you only have to take the beach road into Santa
Pola to see what i mean, then along came the
property boom and all the development along
with it which entailed building as close to the sea
as possible. The joke being that properties sold
as front line ended up having an apartment block
built in front of them with the all too familiar wall
and closed gates so no access was easily avail-
able. The occupants in these blocks regarding the
beach in front of them as a private beach with all
the snobbery that entailed, then in 1988 along
came the Ley de Costas which has helped to
resolve the issue regarding these developments.
Those of us around before this law used to say
they will be building on stilts in the sea before
long but thankfully this never arose, but we had
a laugh about it at the time. Now all this building
has allowed a lot of people to afford a holiday
or retirement home in the sun and good luck to
them and i do not begrudge them this small lux-
ury, in fact i quite like the idea of working class
people having this opportunity to own something
better than a beach hut at Clacton or Skegness.
It’s just the way the actual beach area has been
spoiled that i have some reservations about
because it has just spoilt it with all the build-
ing so close. Anyway that’s my gripe over with
for now unless something else rattles my cage
regarding this subject but i now want to discuss
other things that are closer or were closer and
of which i have fond regards. and that’s some of
the people i have known here in Spain over the
years who have either passed on to that great
beach paradise in the sky…but this sort of thing
i cannot write about too much because someone
always knows someone else, but yes i have seen
many come and go and lose a lot of money in the
process from the man running a fishing boat for
fishing trips to the man who tried to open a car
spares shop. Now the idea might have been ok
but the timing left a lot to be desired to say the
least, when not many of the urbanisations had
even been conceived on paper let alone built. Or
who were put out of business before they even
had a chance to get off the ground because in
them days - in the not so distant past - you had
to have a Spanish partner to start a business
here in Spain - before they joined the common
market fully.
I have heard of or encountered many of these
sorts of things over the 23 years of living here
from people meeting a local waiter called shall
we say Pepe who spoke a bit of English and offer
some of these people a dream come true buying
a bar in Spain and a new life. sending their local
Pepe a small fortune to buy the bar which was
duly done with their money all above board and
on the level till they had been here six months
only to arrive for work one day to find that the
bar had been sold by their so called business
partner and friend Pepe. Because the deeds (es-
critura) was bought in Pepe’s name only and once
he had a property developer or someone else in-
terested in a up and running successful bar it was
sold, also the car rental firm that had a Spanish
partner and was set up with a lot of one man’s
money only to be milked rotten by the Spanish
partner who was responsible for the buying and
selling of the cars because they spoke Spanish.
Even the wrecked cars were sold on paper for
peanuts only to be repaired and a nice drink out
of it for
someone
who shall
remain nameless.
And when a certain
mechanic used these
cars for repairs to the
existing fleet so that when
the man called Pepe came
to take away a car there
was only what was left of
a crunched body shell left
then the screaming
started. After that a
private local break-
down truck was
used so no-one in
the head office even
knew that a car was
written off - if it was
picked up before
they knew.
So the list goes on
from estate agents
with power of at-
torney to so called
property administra-
tors of urbanisations and the old favourite of a
Spanish fiscal representative which seems to
have died a death but the law was brought in
about 10 or so years ago as i remember and was
a prescription for certain fiscal representatives to
levy a non-existent tax on his customers and call
it a payment tax so he could buy a new boat or
another Mercedes car for his wife.
As stated i have lived here a long while now and
what i haven’t seen with my own eyes, I’ve heard
about from the bar room lawyers who seem to be
around everywhere, but i cannot say i have heard
them all yet…because i haven’t and something
new is always being talked about somewhere
along the coast.
World Cup fever is turning up in unexpected places this summer-non more so than 10 metres underwater in the Costa Blanca! The dive crew at Dive Academy Santa Pola are offering 1/2 price dives, discover scubas and snorkeling experiences within 48 hours of your team winning a game during this summer's World Cup finals. Owner and PADI Instructor Damon Rose explains; 'We were going to offer the 1/2 price promotion within 24 hours of your team win-ning it's game but then we figured people might be a bit worse for wear the follow-ing morning after an important match! Basically we are offering divers or people wanting to learn to dive or snorkel a chance to celebrate their teams victory with a great days fun.' England supporter Damon is quite prepared for his team putting him out of pocket for a month. 'Obviously, personally I'd like England to do well but that could mean
me giving away dozens of dive experiences to English tourists and expats if they go far in the tournament. Not forgetting Spain, Holland, Germany, Italy and France of course!' And who do Dive Academy expect to be giving away most 1/2 price dives to? 'Spain. I'd be very surprised if Spain didn't go very far'.
And what about a Spain vs. England final?; ' I'm not sure we could afford that! However we could have a divers penalty shoot out underwater complete with scuba gear and fins before the actual final itself!'
HE CAME, HE SAW….HE WON’T GO BACKCOLIN says his bit about life as an expat
You can lead a horse to water…but a pint is better!Local riders from El Palmera stables near Guardamar arrived at El Raso on horseback in May and en-joyed a cool beer…I suppose the horses ordered a red rum…?
ONE SHORT PLANK A quick note from the editor to the
lady(?) in the blue t-shirt who complained loudly at Oro y Sal cafeteria in Gran Alacant last month… that the menu was in Spanish – well spotted love…do
you want a lift to the airport…or you gonna walk? whichever– just go
away. pic. A miserable old fat cow.
Jim, Lisa, Julie and Gillian from La Palmera stables in Rojales
Me and Mrs. Jones
Not civil to the GuardiaBy BullyIt had all started so well. A sunny afternoon, me putting up a fence in the garden while Mrs Jones and Meg soaked up some rays. Then the Guardia turned up. At first it wasn’t clear what exactly I’d done wrong to deserve the presence of two officers of the crown at my gate, but here they were. Apparently someone had smashed into a car and left the scene pretty rapidly, forgetting to fill out the ac-cident form and disappearing into the distance. Apparently, that someone was me. Now at this point they asked to see my car, so I showed them. ‘No, the other car,’ said one of them with very bushy eyebrows (I actually wondered how he could see me but I bet they
are handy in the summer…). I offered the (honest) excuse that I didn’t have another but (apparently) I had ac-quired a BMW (black) with significant frontal damage. It didn’t matter what I said they insisted that I must have hidden it somewhere…all this was get-ting hard to take, especially with his eyebrows moving up and down as he talked. Eventually, they agreed to look at my ID and realised that my name, and the guy’s they were looking for, were completely different. At last, some common sense was going to prevail (I thought) but I was on another train of thought completely to eyebrows and his mate. My ID was false. It was checked, by phone, by radio all they failed to do was hold it up to my face and compare but they were not having it. Despite my protestations I was heading for the cooler (I know... but it’s the only way I can get my name in the same sentence as Steve McQueen…) and arrangements were made (by them) for me to be taken away.My knights in shining armour turned out to be the Local Police, who ar-rived in the nick (geddit?) of time and called me ‘Dave,’ I almost replied with an ‘I love you’ as eyebrows whipped his head between the two of us lost in the confusion. My friendly boys in blue began a serious sounding, although I
could only hear whispers, conversa-tion, about me. The looks over the shoulder from all the officers were still unnerving; especially eyebrows and I began to worry for my future once again. Stripy pyjamas are just not me, especially the ones with arrows on. Anyway, to keep a long story long, it turned out that I didn’t have a BMW, hadn’t crashed and legged it and I was, in fact, the bloke that it said I was. Bit like Ronseal really. So every-one was happy once again, although eyebrows and co’ didn’t offer an apol-ogy but they did shake my hand over the gate. It was that point that Mrs Jones decided to put in an appearance and put her front paws on the top of the gate – eyeballing eyebrows – and then it happened. To give him credit he took it well and returned to his car without another word. Mrs Jones, for her part, had let out the longest belch I’ve heard from any animal, let alone a Great Dane, into his face. It was compounded by the noise of her cheeks rattling against her gums from the force of the escaping air, and Eyebrows er, eyebrows being pushed against his forehead.I don’t expect Eyebrows to hold a grudge, but just in case, if anyone can bake a nice jam sponge, with a file in it…
11
12 your local mag’ online and FREE!! - www.thejungledrums.com
La Marina
Ref:433 122.500€Reduced... Spacious 2 bed,
1 bath ext Det Rosa.
La Marina
Ref:439 115.000€2 bed, 1 bath sth facing, corner plot, comm. Pool.
La marina.
La Marina
Ref:441 119.500€3 bed, 2 bath, quad conservato-ry, en-suite to master bed Utility
Room, Separate Kitchen.
La Marina
Ref:450 114.500€ 2 bed, 1 bath, utility rm, Air Cond, comm. Pool South
Facing, Priced to sell !
La Marina
Ref:451 99.000€ 2 bed, 1 bath immaculate
ext terraced Fina and Ample Parking, Central Location.
La Marina
Ref:445 128.500€3 bed, 2 bath, spacious
quad, sep Kitchen, good location.
La Marina
Ref:453 220.000€4 bed, 2 bath det villa, exc. cond, pool, store rm, sep
kitchen
La Marina
Ref:452 159.500€3 bed, 2 bath immaculate
det Rosa, Gas heating, BBQ,
La Marina
Ref:444 179.500€2 bed, 2 bath det lola, comm.
Pool, en-suite, furnished.
La Marina
Ref:454 144.500€2 bed, 2 bath det villa with
under build & comm. Pool l
Avda. Londres 1-A, Local 8, Urb. La Marina San FulgencioOffice: 96 679 5233 email:info@ipgspain.comVisit our website to view our extensive range of properties:www.ipgspain.com
Homes in Spain
JuneOffersSALE!
La Marina
Ref:094 95.000€2 bed, 1 bath spacious town house u/build &
garage.
La Marina
Ref:449 195.000€3 beds, 2 bath hugely ext,det Lola with garage/workshop.
nr Gandia
Ref:446 82.500€3 Bed, 2 bath, Large 3
storey Townhouse, Pictur-esque location,
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Avda. Escandinavia, 72, C.C. Altomar II, Local 8, Manzana E, 03130
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Espana - Spain · info@jlcalawyers.com
36
LONDON: 96-98 Baker Street W1 U6TJ LondonTel. 0044(0)20072241095
e-mail. londonoffice@jlcalawyers.com
Many of you will already have an idea of the buying and selling processes in Spain, which are considerably more complicated than in the UK. There are many types of services which will offer assistance in these processes, but we would encourage people to use a lawyer – this is because it is our business, we have experience of the pitfalls and can often foresee issues where others would not, which can in the long-term save you money and undue anxiety caused by problems which can arise – especially regarding the taxes involved, for example capital gains, and the new increase on IVA for new built properties which will be implemented in July of this year
Buying
When a client decides to purchase a property in Spain, we provide them with the services listed below. They include all of the legal stages required to successfully complete a sale agreement, and thus avoid the numerous potential pitfalls:
1. After the client has decided to buy a property, the architect-surveyor issues an approval report for the property, which means the client can be sure they are not buying a property with hidden defects or flaws. This stage is optional, although we recommend that our clients commission this report, given the large amounts of money that are involved. 2. We search the Land Registry to find out what the legal situation of the property is, in order to verify whether or not it is encumbered, and if there are any facilities or difficulties attached to its purchase. 3. We draw up a private sale agreement before signing the Public Deed at the notary office. It is important to remember that in Spain the private sale agreement is extremely important. We cannot emphasize enough this point. Agreements made in this Private Purchase Contract are binding at the time of signing for the Title Deeds – Price, Conditions and Timescales.4. We execute a power of attorney at the Notary’s office so that in the event of the client being unable to attend the sale, the Public Deed can be notarised at the Notary’s office within the deadline specified in the private sale agreement. If it is not possible to sign the power of attorney in Spain, we collaborate with notary offices in the United Kingdom, and other countries, which means that it can be executed in the country of origin. 5. We open bank accounts for our clients in Spain, and if they need finance, we provide advice on mortgages. Our clients have the advantage that financing is generally cheaper in Spain. 6. We prepare the documentation needed for the Public Deed, and on the day of signing we either accompany the client, or sign on their behalf with the power of attorney.
7. We advise our clients about taxes in Spain, and we also liquidate and pay the taxes on their behalf. We accompany foreign clients to the police station in the area where they are buying to apply for a Foreigner’s Identity Number (N.I.E), and arrange for the documentation to be collected and delivered to them or, if they prefer, they can appoint us to be their tax representatives in Spain. 8. While the Public Deed (First Copy) is being processed at the Land Registry, we withdraw copies of it on behalf of our clients and send it to their residence. 9. We register the Public Deed at the Land Registry. 10. Wills. We strongly recommend that all of our Spanish and International clients make a Spanish will, as this is essential if you wish to save your loved ones a long and tedious process when proving their inheritance rights to your assets in Spain. (This was explained in more detail in our previous article for May 2010).
Selling
Although clients who want to sell a property have to comply with the same legal procedures as those that were described previously for purchasers, the tax implications are very different. For this reason, we provide our clients with pre-sale advice in order to avoid problems, in particular with the capital gains tax that they may be liable for.
All the documents are prepared by our firm, so that even if the client is not in Spain we can act of their behalf, complete the sale, and transfer their money to wherever they request us to do so.
As always, JLCA & As.-Lawyers are on hand to offer advice on buying and selling, making sure that your best interests are catered for at all times.
ELCHE: Avda. de Alicante, 24 7°03203 - Elche ·Espana - Spain Telf: 966 612 816 ·
Fax: 965 427 800 infonacional@jlcalawyers.com
JLCA & AS LawyersJosé-Luis Campillo & Asociados
Abogados - Lawyerswww.jlcalawyers.com
INDEPENDENT LAW & TAX ADVICE
ASK THE LAWYER…Top local lawyer Jose Luis answers your legal questions.
BUYING AND SELLING PROPERTY IN SPAIN
THE CHEAPEST ADVERTISING ON THE COSTA !!- TEL 606 540 40814
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16
We are nearing the anniversary of the sad death of the previous writer of this column, my dear friend Brian Conduit, and it is with his memory well to the fore that I write. An avid sports fan, he always delighted in watching the Tour de France on television. But he watched it with half an eye on the birds they inevitably focussed on as they recorded – or he simply spotted them in the background. He would ring me that night and say, ‘See the Griffon Vulture today?’ Or ‘What a pillock – the commentator said that Black Kite was an eagle.’During the course of several tours, we logged, between us, some 40 species. Besides those I’ve mentioned, notable finds were Alpine Chough, Booted Eagle, Common Buzzard, Red Kite, Red-legged Partridge and once, even a Lammergeier, as the tour crept over a Pyrenean pass.I can’t, in fact, watch a film or series without seeing or hearing the background birds. Thus a play set in the twenties in Western Europe is rendered false by the persistent coo-ing of a Collared Dove – not to be found anywhere west of Asiatic Turkey at those dates. Similarly at odds are the night-time soundtracks of many series and films. It seems as if directors buy
‘stock footage’ of ‘atmospheric’ soundtracks, which often seem to feature Tengmalm’s Owl, a rare species which occurs only in mountains or the far north – it has a nice spooky ‘hoot’.More stock footage comes into play in French movies, which often seem to have a Nightingale or a Willow Warbler singing lustily, even when there isn’t a scrap of leaf on the trees, and even when there’s snow on the ground – and all those birds are sensibly trying to rid Africa of its insects.Still more stock-footage comes when American films include a soundtrack featuring wholly European Tawny Owl calls.Geography can be fun. The summer scenes in Doctor Zhivago have an Iberian Chiffchaff singing – way out of range on the Russian steppes, while the
spaghetti westerns, like ‘The Good, the Bad and the Ugly’ feature Blackbirds, Thekla Lark and Sardinian Warbler – nothing of the sort is found in the Arizona desert.Films ‘made for television’ such as the often rather turgid ‘thrillers’ they show in the afternoons on Antenna 3 or Telecinco, may be made in the USA or, sometimes in Germany or Austria. If you can’t see a car or some other giveaway, almost all American films feature the ‘caw’ of an American Crow in the distance. News and current affairs programmes give you an occasional ‘armchair tick’ too – I only recently saw some very red-breasted Swallows flying under a bridge in Afghanistan – well, at least it’s better than the news item you’re supposed to be watching!But it won’t be long now before the Tour de France fills my sceen, and I shall not feel ashamed if a stray tear blurs the image, as I remember Brian – ‘Hey, Armstrong did it again, eh – but did you see that raptor as they crossed the Tourmalet – what do you reckon – Golden Eagle?’
TELE-BIRDINGby Malcolm Palmer
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YOUR HEALTH CARE IN SPAIN
Expats in Spain have two different ways
of receiving medical care:
One option is the Public Health Service, for
which you have to have a SIP and know
the possible limitations of the service.
The other choice is private healthcare
and in Alicante province we are fortunate
to have one of the best Private Medical
Assistance Chains, including hospitals and
doctors.
Obviously, there are some clear
advantages for the expat in the Private
Health in respect to the Public one.
1. English speaking doctors, family
doctors
and specialists
2. Immediate attention by the specialists.
3. No waiting lists for operations or
diagnosis.
To qualify for using the national health
service, you will need to be a tax payer or a
pensioner but it is much simpler for many
to sign up for private medical insurance,
which in Spain is much cheaper than in the
UK and one of the best choices of medical
insurance for its relation services-price is
With more than 50 years of experience,
they are specialists in medical insurances
for the expat in Alicante province and they
are well aware that when you consider
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MARTINEZ & BALLESTER was legally established in 1979 by Pedro Antonio Martínez, Sworn Public English Translator, who also had a wide knowledge of German and French. always well-known for his politeness and his sense of obligation, After his sudden death in 1987, the business continued under the name of MAR-TINEZ & BALLESTER, RABESMA S.L., with two offices: in Torrevieja and in Gran Alacant.For more than 30 years our company has been supplying a first class legal service to the citi-zens of the Costa Blanca and beyond. Our aim has always been to offer our clients individual and personal attention, assuring a kind and friendly service at every moment.Whether you need assistance with Property Purchase and Land Registry searches; Wills and Inheritance; Car Imports and Transfers; Health, Car and House insurance; Finance and Fiscal advice; Claim of Traffic accidents; Courts Litigation and Legal advice; we have the skills to help you.Call us for a completely free consultation; we speak Spanish-English-German and French
LOOK AFTER YOURSELF
El Perpetuo Socorro
...and more!
Av. Noruega 174, Local 8, Novamar Gran Alacant, 03130 Santa Pola Tel/Fax 966 698 781 Mobile 696 289 407e-mail: alacant@martinezandballester.com
C/ Concepción Nº 6, 1ºA03181 TorreviejaTlf: 965 710 353 Fax 965 710 267e-mail: torre@martinezandballester.com rabesma@terra.es
NOTE: Last month we published by mistake, the wrong tele-phone number and address. We apologise for any problems you may have had in trying to contact us.
Notarial Title Deeds
Spanish Wills
Power of Attorney
Private contracts
Conveyancing
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Electricity and water contracts
Rates contracts
Fiscal Representation
Fiscal numbers (N.I.E.)
House & Car Insurance
Health Insurance
Car Import & Transfers
Spanish driving licences
Tax returns for Residents &Non Residents
www.martinezandballester.com
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Flaming June - Jungle Drums’ World Cup al-ternativesIf you’ve been fast asleep for the past three months and are just about to wake up bleary eyed and grumpy, it’s gonna come as a bit of a shock to learn that all you’ll hear about on the news and in the papers for the foreseeable future is a not insignificant football tourna-ment occurring way down south somewhere near Durban. Fear not, grab a fag, finish your cuppa and read on because a sedentary life-style featuring a football shirt just too small to cover the entire stom-ach, pizza, beer and the settee for the next five weeks most definitely aren’t all you’ve got to look for-ward to. Us jolly thoughtful Jungle Drums chaps now give you the low-down on what else is occurring this month.
LAS HOGUERAS DE SAN JUANRight, now I’ve got your attention I’ll bash on and start in Alicante which hosts its annual fiestas from June 20th until the 24th. Everywhere else makes do with the Moros y Cristia-nos, but Alicante goes one better, and, as you’d expect from the na-tion that brought the world the San Fermin bull running in Pamplona and La Tomatina, it’s a bit danger-ous. For the previous week or two, various residents committees in all four corners of the city will have been hard at work overseeing the construction of massive papier mache effigies, (hogueras), all of which, accompanied by mental firework displays, will be torched in the name of entertainment over the evening of June 23rd and the early hours of June the 24th. Pos-sibly not the night then to be on shift with blue watch of the local bomberos!! Before Alicante col-lectively reaches for the Swan Ves-tas pop along, because, just like those ubiquitous sand sculptures, you’ll be blown away, there prob-ably isn’t a more spectacular way to celebrate the Summer Solstice. Be warned though, car parking is next to impossible, with various im-portant streets closed off, so get there early.http://www.hoguerasorg/web/in-dex.php
AN EMOTIVE SUBJECT
Next up, something quite a few Brits find somewhat distasteful - the bullfight, or, as the natives would say “La Corrida” The last couple of times I attended it was six nil, but in recent weeks the Spanish press has been full of stories about dear old Taurus the bull getting his own back. Perhaps surprisingly, pub-lic opinion in Spain is also divided with growing numbers opposed to the spectacle. If you fancy going, tickets can be obtained from any Carrefour branch and are priced not just according to your proxim-ity to the claret but also whether you choose to sit in the sun, shade or a combination of both. In 2010, the Plaza de Toros in Alicante, a majestic edifice steeped in history, has eights days worth of an event which is a mix of pure theatre, bal-let and the circus. Each of this years Corridas, from the 17th to the 27th, take place in the evening and start at seven pm.http://www.torosalicante.com/in-dex.php
IT AIN’T HALF HOT MUMAs the temperatures creep up and you start sweating like a dyslexic on Countdown, spare a thought for the players of Elche and Hercules
football clubs. Their seasons started way back in August last year and aren’t due to be completed until the third week of this month. Both clubs are pushing hard for promo-tion to La Primera and the chance to host giants such as Barcelona and Real Madrid. Hercules take on Rayo Vallecano on June the 12th in their final home game of the sea-son while Elche have two fixtures to complete en casa. First, an en-ticing local derby against Murcia on the 6th beckons and then they face the mighty Real Sociedad on the 20th in their last outing before the squad hits the beach, the golf course or the missus. Sorry for men-tioning the ‘F’ word.http://www.elchecf.es/index.php http://www.herculescf.es/
A DANGEROUS COMBINATIONDon’t be surprised to see vari-ous cars ands vans dropping off vast piles off wood on the regions beaches on the afternoon of June 23rd, they’re not fly tipping it’s all in preparation for the celebrations of San Juan, where, on the shortest night of the year a heady cock-tail of barbecued grub, copious quantities of alcohol and a bit of skinny dripping come together as sinners everywhere get completely
mashed and jump over a bonfire three times to purify and cleanse themselves. Afterwards any badly burnt soles of feet are quenched in the adjacent Med’ and the glow-ing embers, if people remember, are buried forever under the sands. This is the one, just like November the 5th in the UK, which A&E de-partments around the Costa Blan-ca and beyond fear most.
ELSEWHERE ON OUR PATCH
If you prefer your evenings out not to have such an element of risk,thirty of Elche’s best restaurants are collectively holding an event en-titled “The Star Dish”, where, for € 3.00 you can sample some of the cities culinary specialities, many of which change daily. Look sharp though it finishes on Wednesday the 9th. Fancy a bevy or two? then get yourselves down to the Gran Al-acant Centro Comercial, where, for one night only, popular bar Shamu celebrates it’s fifth birthday on Friday the 11th. The evening kicks off about nine-ish and contin-ues, like the very best Spanish do’s, until the small hours with live music by acoustic rock band Steel Horse, you might even bump into one or two of those friendly Jungle Drums
types . I’m not sure what it is with Spain and pyromania; in the month Ali-cante goes to blazes, so to speak, Aspe and Guardamar get in on the act as well. The Night of St. John on the 23rd sees residents and visitors to Guardamar witness the magical “firedance” followed the next night by a ritual burning of all the witches and creations that took part. In-land, and at about the same time, Aspe folk go berserk with their ciga-rette lighters too in similar fashion before retiring to a local tavern for a well deserved ale or two. If none of these suggestions float your boat, there’s always the LGTBI fair in Elche during the last week of the month, it’s for Lesbian, Gay, Transsexual, Bisexual and the Inter-sexual. What the hell’s an Intersexu-al? Have fun!!
There’s so much to enjoy in Spain…without having to take your clothes off…JD reporter Kevin Rendall has been sent out and about to find out ex-actly what’s on…and where.
Next month Kevin checks out his stools (shouldn’t that be stalls?) as he roams the region finding the best markets for the JD readers.
25NEW LOW! LOW! ADVERTISING RATES - TEL. 606 540 408
Flaming June - Jungle Drums’ World Cup al-ternativesIf you’ve been fast asleep for the past three months and are just about to wake up bleary eyed and grumpy, it’s gonna come as a bit of a shock to learn that all you’ll hear about on the news and in the papers for the foreseeable future is a not insignificant football tourna-ment occurring way down south somewhere near Durban. Fear not, grab a fag, finish your cuppa and read on because a sedentary life-style featuring a football shirt just too small to cover the entire stom-ach, pizza, beer and the settee for the next five weeks most definitely aren’t all you’ve got to look for-ward to. Us jolly thoughtful Jungle Drums chaps now give you the low-down on what else is occurring this month.
LAS HOGUERAS DE SAN JUANRight, now I’ve got your attention I’ll bash on and start in Alicante which hosts its annual fiestas from June 20th until the 24th. Everywhere else makes do with the Moros y Cristia-nos, but Alicante goes one better, and, as you’d expect from the na-tion that brought the world the San Fermin bull running in Pamplona and La Tomatina, it’s a bit danger-ous. For the previous week or two, various residents committees in all four corners of the city will have been hard at work overseeing the construction of massive papier mache effigies, (hogueras), all of which, accompanied by mental firework displays, will be torched in the name of entertainment over the evening of June 23rd and the early hours of June the 24th. Pos-sibly not the night then to be on shift with blue watch of the local bomberos!! Before Alicante col-lectively reaches for the Swan Ves-tas pop along, because, just like those ubiquitous sand sculptures, you’ll be blown away, there prob-ably isn’t a more spectacular way to celebrate the Summer Solstice. Be warned though, car parking is next to impossible, with various im-portant streets closed off, so get there early.http://www.hoguerasorg/web/in-dex.php
AN EMOTIVE SUBJECT
Next up, something quite a few Brits find somewhat distasteful - the bullfight, or, as the natives would say “La Corrida” The last couple of times I attended it was six nil, but in recent weeks the Spanish press has been full of stories about dear old Taurus the bull getting his own back. Perhaps surprisingly, pub-lic opinion in Spain is also divided with growing numbers opposed to the spectacle. If you fancy going, tickets can be obtained from any Carrefour branch and are priced not just according to your proxim-ity to the claret but also whether you choose to sit in the sun, shade or a combination of both. In 2010, the Plaza de Toros in Alicante, a majestic edifice steeped in history, has eights days worth of an event which is a mix of pure theatre, bal-let and the circus. Each of this years Corridas, from the 17th to the 27th, take place in the evening and start at seven pm.http://www.torosalicante.com/in-dex.php
IT AIN’T HALF HOT MUMAs the temperatures creep up and you start sweating like a dyslexic on Countdown, spare a thought for the players of Elche and Hercules
football clubs. Their seasons started way back in August last year and aren’t due to be completed until the third week of this month. Both clubs are pushing hard for promo-tion to La Primera and the chance to host giants such as Barcelona and Real Madrid. Hercules take on Rayo Vallecano on June the 12th in their final home game of the sea-son while Elche have two fixtures to complete en casa. First, an en-ticing local derby against Murcia on the 6th beckons and then they face the mighty Real Sociedad on the 20th in their last outing before the squad hits the beach, the golf course or the missus. Sorry for men-tioning the ‘F’ word.http://www.elchecf.es/index.php http://www.herculescf.es/
A DANGEROUS COMBINATIONDon’t be surprised to see vari-ous cars ands vans dropping off vast piles off wood on the regions beaches on the afternoon of June 23rd, they’re not fly tipping it’s all in preparation for the celebrations of San Juan, where, on the shortest night of the year a heady cock-tail of barbecued grub, copious quantities of alcohol and a bit of skinny dripping come together as sinners everywhere get completely
mashed and jump over a bonfire three times to purify and cleanse themselves. Afterwards any badly burnt soles of feet are quenched in the adjacent Med’ and the glow-ing embers, if people remember, are buried forever under the sands. This is the one, just like November the 5th in the UK, which A&E de-partments around the Costa Blan-ca and beyond fear most.
ELSEWHERE ON OUR PATCH
If you prefer your evenings out not to have such an element of risk,thirty of Elche’s best restaurants are collectively holding an event en-titled “The Star Dish”, where, for € 3.00 you can sample some of the cities culinary specialities, many of which change daily. Look sharp though it finishes on Wednesday the 9th. Fancy a bevy or two? then get yourselves down to the Gran Al-acant Centro Comercial, where, for one night only, popular bar Shamu celebrates it’s fifth birthday on Friday the 11th. The evening kicks off about nine-ish and contin-ues, like the very best Spanish do’s, until the small hours with live music by acoustic rock band Steel Horse, you might even bump into one or two of those friendly Jungle Drums
types . I’m not sure what it is with Spain and pyromania; in the month Ali-cante goes to blazes, so to speak, Aspe and Guardamar get in on the act as well. The Night of St. John on the 23rd sees residents and visitors to Guardamar witness the magical “firedance” followed the next night by a ritual burning of all the witches and creations that took part. In-land, and at about the same time, Aspe folk go berserk with their ciga-rette lighters too in similar fashion before retiring to a local tavern for a well deserved ale or two. If none of these suggestions float your boat, there’s always the LGTBI fair in Elche during the last week of the month, it’s for Lesbian, Gay, Transsexual, Bisexual and the Inter-sexual. What the hell’s an Intersexu-al? Have fun!!
There’s so much to enjoy in Spain…without having to take your clothes off…JD reporter Kevin Rendall has been sent out and about to find out ex-actly what’s on…and where.
Next month Kevin checks out his stools (shouldn’t that be stalls?) as he roams the region finding the best markets for the JD readers.
GROUP A11/6 16.00 S.AFRICA - FRANCE11/6 20.30 URUGUAY - FRANCE16/6 20.30 S.AFRICA - URUGUAY17/6 20.30 FRANCE - MEXICO22/6 16.00 MEXICO - URUGUAY22/6 16.00 FRANCE - S.AFRICA
11 JULY 20.30 FINAL
v
1 26/6 16.00 1st GROUP A v 2nd GROUP B v
1 6 JULY 20.30 A v B SEMI FINAL v
GROUP B12/6 13.30 S.KOREA - GREECE12/6 16.00 ARGENTINA - NIGERIA17/6 13.30 ARGENTINA - S.KOREA17/6 16.00 GREECE - NIGERIA22/6 20.30 NIGERIA - S.KOREA22/6 20.30 GREECE - ARGENTINA
GROUP C12/6 20.30 - USA13/6 13.30 ALGERIA - SLOVAKIA18/6 16.00 SLOVAKIA - USA18/6 20.30 - ALGERIA23/6 16.00 SLOVAKIA - 23/6 16.00 USA - ALGERIA
GROUP D13/6 16.00 SERBIA - GHANA13/6 20.30 GERMANY - AUSTRALIA18/6 13.30 GERMANY - SERBIA19/6 16.00 GHANA - AUSTRALIA23/6 20.30 GHANA - GERMANY23/6 20.30 AUSTRALIA - SERBIA
GROUP E14/6 13.30 HOLLAND - DENMARK14/6 16.00 JAPAN - CAMEROON19/6 13.30 HOLLAND - JAPAN19/6 20.30 CAMEROON - DENMARK24/6 20.30 CAMEROON - HOLLAND24/6 20.30 DENMARK - JAPAN
GROUP F14/6 20.30 ITALY - PARAGUAY15/6 13.30 N.ZEALAND - CZECH REPUB20/6 13.30 CZECH.REPUB - PARAGUAY20/6 16.00 ITALY - N.ZEALAND24/6 16.00 CZECH.REPUB - ITALY24/6 16.00 PARAQUAY - N. ZEALAND
GROUP G15/6 16.00 IVORY C. - PORTUGAL15/6 20.30 BRAZIL - N.KOREA20/6 20.30 BRAZIL - IVORY C.21/6 13.30 PORTUGAL - N.KOREA25/6 16.00 PORTUGAL - BRAZIL25/6 16.00 N.KOREA - IVORY C.
GROUP H16/6 13.30 HONDURAS - CHILE16/6 16.00 - SWITZERLAND21/6 16.00 CHILE - SWITZERLAND21/6 20.30 - HONDURAS25/6 20.30 CHILE -25/6 20.30 SWITZERLAND - HONDURAS
2 26/6 20.30 1st GROUP C v 2nd GROUP D v
3 27/6 16.00 1st GROUP D v 2nd GROUP C v
4 27/6 20.30 1st GROUP B v 2nd GROUP A v
5 28/6 16.00 1st GROUP E v 2nd GROUP F v
6 28/6 20.30 1st GROUP G v 2nd GROUP H v
7 29/6 16.00 1st GROUP F v 2nd GROUP E v
8 29/6 20.30 1st GROUP H v 2nd GROUP G v
A 02/7 16.00 WINNER 5 v WINNER 6 v
B 02/7 20.30 WINNER 1 v WINNER 2 v
C 03/7 16.00 WINNER 3 v WINNER 4 v
D 03/7 20.30 WINNER 7 v WINNER 8 v
2 7 JULY 20.30 C v D SEMI FINAL v
ALL TIMES SHOWN ARE SPANISH
ENGLAND
ENGLANDENGLAND
SPAIN
SPAIN SPAIN
659 728 120
COME ON ENGLAND!
27
GROUP A11/6 16.00 S.AFRICA - FRANCE11/6 20.30 URUGUAY - FRANCE16/6 20.30 S.AFRICA - URUGUAY17/6 20.30 FRANCE - MEXICO22/6 16.00 MEXICO - URUGUAY22/6 16.00 FRANCE - S.AFRICA
11 JULY 20.30 FINAL
v
1 26/6 16.00 1st GROUP A v 2nd GROUP B v
1 6 JULY 20.30 A v B SEMI FINAL v
GROUP B12/6 13.30 S.KOREA - GREECE12/6 16.00 ARGENTINA - NIGERIA17/6 13.30 ARGENTINA - S.KOREA17/6 16.00 GREECE - NIGERIA22/6 20.30 NIGERIA - S.KOREA22/6 20.30 GREECE - ARGENTINA
GROUP C12/6 20.30 - USA13/6 13.30 ALGERIA - SLOVAKIA18/6 16.00 SLOVAKIA - USA18/6 20.30 - ALGERIA23/6 16.00 SLOVAKIA - 23/6 16.00 USA - ALGERIA
GROUP D13/6 16.00 SERBIA - GHANA13/6 20.30 GERMANY - AUSTRALIA18/6 13.30 GERMANY - SERBIA19/6 16.00 GHANA - AUSTRALIA23/6 20.30 GHANA - GERMANY23/6 20.30 AUSTRALIA - SERBIA
GROUP E14/6 13.30 HOLLAND - DENMARK14/6 16.00 JAPAN - CAMEROON19/6 13.30 HOLLAND - JAPAN19/6 20.30 CAMEROON - DENMARK24/6 20.30 CAMEROON - HOLLAND24/6 20.30 DENMARK - JAPAN
GROUP F14/6 20.30 ITALY - PARAGUAY15/6 13.30 N.ZEALAND - CZECH REPUB20/6 13.30 CZECH.REPUB - PARAGUAY20/6 16.00 ITALY - N.ZEALAND24/6 16.00 CZECH.REPUB - ITALY24/6 16.00 PARAQUAY - N. ZEALAND
GROUP G15/6 16.00 IVORY C. - PORTUGAL15/6 20.30 BRAZIL - N.KOREA20/6 20.30 BRAZIL - IVORY C.21/6 13.30 PORTUGAL - N.KOREA25/6 16.00 PORTUGAL - BRAZIL25/6 16.00 N.KOREA - IVORY C.
GROUP H16/6 13.30 HONDURAS - CHILE16/6 16.00 - SWITZERLAND21/6 16.00 CHILE - SWITZERLAND21/6 20.30 - HONDURAS25/6 20.30 CHILE -25/6 20.30 SWITZERLAND - HONDURAS
2 26/6 20.30 1st GROUP C v 2nd GROUP D v
3 27/6 16.00 1st GROUP D v 2nd GROUP C v
4 27/6 20.30 1st GROUP B v 2nd GROUP A v
5 28/6 16.00 1st GROUP E v 2nd GROUP F v
6 28/6 20.30 1st GROUP G v 2nd GROUP H v
7 29/6 16.00 1st GROUP F v 2nd GROUP E v
8 29/6 20.30 1st GROUP H v 2nd GROUP G v
A 02/7 16.00 WINNER 5 v WINNER 6 v
B 02/7 20.30 WINNER 1 v WINNER 2 v
C 03/7 16.00 WINNER 3 v WINNER 4 v
D 03/7 20.30 WINNER 7 v WINNER 8 v
2 7 JULY 20.30 C v D SEMI FINAL v
ALL TIMES SHOWN ARE SPANISH
ENGLAND
ENGLANDENGLAND
SPAIN
SPAIN SPAIN
659 728 120
COME ON ENGLAND!
GROUP A11/6 16.00 S.AFRICA - FRANCE11/6 20.30 URUGUAY - FRANCE16/6 20.30 S.AFRICA - URUGUAY17/6 20.30 FRANCE - MEXICO22/6 16.00 MEXICO - URUGUAY22/6 16.00 FRANCE - S.AFRICA
11 JULY 20.30 FINAL
v
1 26/6 16.00 1st GROUP A v 2nd GROUP B v
1 6 JULY 20.30 A v B SEMI FINAL v
GROUP B12/6 13.30 S.KOREA - GREECE12/6 16.00 ARGENTINA - NIGERIA17/6 13.30 ARGENTINA - S.KOREA17/6 16.00 GREECE - NIGERIA22/6 20.30 NIGERIA - S.KOREA22/6 20.30 GREECE - ARGENTINA
GROUP C12/6 20.30 - USA13/6 13.30 ALGERIA - SLOVAKIA18/6 16.00 SLOVAKIA - USA18/6 20.30 - ALGERIA23/6 16.00 SLOVAKIA - 23/6 16.00 USA - ALGERIA
GROUP D13/6 16.00 SERBIA - GHANA13/6 20.30 GERMANY - AUSTRALIA18/6 13.30 GERMANY - SERBIA19/6 16.00 GHANA - AUSTRALIA23/6 20.30 GHANA - GERMANY23/6 20.30 AUSTRALIA - SERBIA
GROUP E14/6 13.30 HOLLAND - DENMARK14/6 16.00 JAPAN - CAMEROON19/6 13.30 HOLLAND - JAPAN19/6 20.30 CAMEROON - DENMARK24/6 20.30 CAMEROON - HOLLAND24/6 20.30 DENMARK - JAPAN
GROUP F14/6 20.30 ITALY - PARAGUAY15/6 13.30 N.ZEALAND - CZECH REPUB20/6 13.30 CZECH.REPUB - PARAGUAY20/6 16.00 ITALY - N.ZEALAND24/6 16.00 CZECH.REPUB - ITALY24/6 16.00 PARAQUAY - N. ZEALAND
GROUP G15/6 16.00 IVORY C. - PORTUGAL15/6 20.30 BRAZIL - N.KOREA20/6 20.30 BRAZIL - IVORY C.21/6 13.30 PORTUGAL - N.KOREA25/6 16.00 PORTUGAL - BRAZIL25/6 16.00 N.KOREA - IVORY C.
GROUP H16/6 13.30 HONDURAS - CHILE16/6 16.00 - SWITZERLAND21/6 16.00 CHILE - SWITZERLAND21/6 20.30 - HONDURAS25/6 20.30 CHILE -25/6 20.30 SWITZERLAND - HONDURAS
2 26/6 20.30 1st GROUP C v 2nd GROUP D v
3 27/6 16.00 1st GROUP D v 2nd GROUP C v
4 27/6 20.30 1st GROUP B v 2nd GROUP A v
5 28/6 16.00 1st GROUP E v 2nd GROUP F v
6 28/6 20.30 1st GROUP G v 2nd GROUP H v
7 29/6 16.00 1st GROUP F v 2nd GROUP E v
8 29/6 20.30 1st GROUP H v 2nd GROUP G v
A 02/7 16.00 WINNER 5 v WINNER 6 v
B 02/7 20.30 WINNER 1 v WINNER 2 v
C 03/7 16.00 WINNER 3 v WINNER 4 v
D 03/7 20.30 WINNER 7 v WINNER 8 v
2 7 JULY 20.30 C v D SEMI FINAL v
ALL TIMES SHOWN ARE SPANISH
ENGLAND
ENGLANDENGLAND
SPAIN
SPAIN SPAIN
CAFEEspanol
www.elparipe.comAVDA ESCANDINAVIA
GRAN ALACANT
COMPLETE UPHOLSTERY
Covering The Costa Blanca
FOAM - Cut to sizeLoose covers MEMORY FOAM
96 56 99305 677 825 149www.complete-upholstery.com
COME ON ENGLAND! Please don’t let it go to penalties....
GROUP A11/6 16.00 S.AFRICA - FRANCE11/6 20.30 URUGUAY - FRANCE16/6 20.30 S.AFRICA - URUGUAY17/6 20.30 FRANCE - MEXICO22/6 16.00 MEXICO - URUGUAY22/6 16.00 FRANCE - S.AFRICA
11 JULY 20.30 FINAL
v
1 26/6 16.00 1st GROUP A v 2nd GROUP B v
1 6 JULY 20.30 A v B SEMI FINAL v
GROUP B12/6 13.30 S.KOREA - GREECE12/6 16.00 ARGENTINA - NIGERIA17/6 13.30 ARGENTINA - S.KOREA17/6 16.00 GREECE - NIGERIA22/6 20.30 NIGERIA - S.KOREA22/6 20.30 GREECE - ARGENTINA
GROUP C12/6 20.30 - USA13/6 13.30 ALGERIA - SLOVAKIA18/6 16.00 SLOVAKIA - USA18/6 20.30 - ALGERIA23/6 16.00 SLOVAKIA - 23/6 16.00 USA - ALGERIA
GROUP D13/6 16.00 SERBIA - GHANA13/6 20.30 GERMANY - AUSTRALIA18/6 13.30 GERMANY - SERBIA19/6 16.00 GHANA - AUSTRALIA23/6 20.30 GHANA - GERMANY23/6 20.30 AUSTRALIA - SERBIA
GROUP E14/6 13.30 HOLLAND - DENMARK14/6 16.00 JAPAN - CAMEROON19/6 13.30 HOLLAND - JAPAN19/6 20.30 CAMEROON - DENMARK24/6 20.30 CAMEROON - HOLLAND24/6 20.30 DENMARK - JAPAN
GROUP F14/6 20.30 ITALY - PARAGUAY15/6 13.30 N.ZEALAND - CZECH REPUB20/6 13.30 CZECH.REPUB - PARAGUAY20/6 16.00 ITALY - N.ZEALAND24/6 16.00 CZECH.REPUB - ITALY24/6 16.00 PARAQUAY - N. ZEALAND
GROUP G15/6 16.00 IVORY C. - PORTUGAL15/6 20.30 BRAZIL - N.KOREA20/6 20.30 BRAZIL - IVORY C.21/6 13.30 PORTUGAL - N.KOREA25/6 16.00 PORTUGAL - BRAZIL25/6 16.00 N.KOREA - IVORY C.
GROUP H16/6 13.30 HONDURAS - CHILE16/6 16.00 - SWITZERLAND21/6 16.00 CHILE - SWITZERLAND21/6 20.30 - HONDURAS25/6 20.30 CHILE -25/6 20.30 SWITZERLAND - HONDURAS
2 26/6 20.30 1st GROUP C v 2nd GROUP D v
3 27/6 16.00 1st GROUP D v 2nd GROUP C v
4 27/6 20.30 1st GROUP B v 2nd GROUP A v
5 28/6 16.00 1st GROUP E v 2nd GROUP F v
6 28/6 20.30 1st GROUP G v 2nd GROUP H v
7 29/6 16.00 1st GROUP F v 2nd GROUP E v
8 29/6 20.30 1st GROUP H v 2nd GROUP G v
A 02/7 16.00 WINNER 5 v WINNER 6 v
B 02/7 20.30 WINNER 1 v WINNER 2 v
C 03/7 16.00 WINNER 3 v WINNER 4 v
D 03/7 20.30 WINNER 7 v WINNER 8 v
2 7 JULY 20.30 C v D SEMI FINAL v
ALL TIMES SHOWN ARE SPANISH
ENGLAND
ENGLANDENGLAND
SPAIN
SPAIN SPAIN
CAFEEspanol
www.elparipe.comAVDA ESCANDINAVIA
GRAN ALACANT
COMPLETE UPHOLSTERY
Covering The Costa Blanca
FOAM - Cut to sizeLoose covers MEMORY FOAM
96 56 99305 677 825 149www.complete-upholstery.com
COME ON ENGLAND! Please don’t let it go to penalties....
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