Growing Grit - Ashcraft After School€¦ · Growing Grit You may have heard of Albert Einstein’s...

Copyright2017,AllRightsReserved,MikeAshcraft,www.ashcraftafterschool.com

GrowingGritYoumayhaveheardofAlbertEinstein’sfamousequationonhistheoryofrelativity…E=MC2.

Ourslightlyless-famousequationonourtheoryofgrittinessis…

G=MC3

GstandsforGritIfirstlearnedabout“grit”fromJohnWayne(TrueGrit–1969Western),butittookeducationalresearchrockstar,AngelaLeeDuckworth(authorofGrit:ThePowerofPassionandPerseverance)tomakegritabuzzwordineducation,andafundamentaltargetedoutcomeforourownafterschoolprograms.DuckworthstudiedWestPointcadets,nationalspellingbeecontestants,studentsinChicagoPublicSchools,andcorporatesalespeople.AllofherresearchsubjectsshowedthatgritisabetterpredictorofsuccessthanotherfactorslikeIQ.Shesays,“Gritispassionandperseveranceforverylong-termgoals.Gritishavingstamina.Gritisstickingwithyourfuture,day-in,day-out.Notjustfortheweek,notjustforthemonth,butforyears.Andworkingreallyhardtomakethatfutureareality.Gritislivinglifelikeit’samarathon,notasprint.”Gritisguts,resilience,insistence,tenacity,determination,endurance,hardiness,resolve,fortitude,mettle,andperseverance.Inoursessionwepresentourconceptualmodel,gritasacompletering-stackingtoy.Grit=Mindset(ConfidenceXControlXCoping).Gritbeginswithafoundationofmindsetuponwhicheverythingelseissupportedandaligned.MstandsforMindsetAsbabies,welearntousewordstoexpresswhatwewant.Laterwordsevolveintosomethinggreaterastheybecomeatypeofthoughtcalled“innerspeech”–alittlevoiceinourhead.Forexample,simplewordslike“smart”or“gifted”or“birthday”arebigconceptsthatcontainmanycomplexnuanceswhentheyexistasinnerspeech.Aswegrowandinteractwithourenvironment,relationships,andexperiences(theERE),innerspeechevolvesinto“mindset.”CarolDweck,world-renownedStanfordUniversitypsychologist,andauthorofthebest-sellingbookMindset:TheNewPsychologyofSuccess,discoveredsignificantlinksbetweenmindsetandstress,success,andachievement.Mindsetistheaccumulationofourparadigms,mentalmodels,beliefs,attitudes,andperceptionsaboutourselvesandourplaceintheworld.Ourmindsetcanbepositiveornegative;growthorfixeddependingonourinteractionswiththeERE.Underafixedmindset,wemightviewintelligenceisgenetic.Itissomethingyouarebornwith.Youcanlearnnewthings,butyoucan’tchangeyourbasiclevelofintelligence.Underafixedmindset,wemightviewtalentincertainareasassomethingthatyoueitherhave,oryoudon’t.

Copyright2017,AllRightsReserved,MikeAshcraft,www.ashcraftafterschool.com

Wearealldealtagenetichandofcards(someofusweredealtjokers).Underagrowthmindset,weunderstandthatwitheffort,wecanimproveourhandsubstantially.Thosewhoarebornthesmartestdon’talwaysendupthesmartestbecauseeffortistheprimarydriverofdevelopmentandlearning.Underagrowthmindset,weknowthatwitheffortanddeliberatepractice,wecangrowabetterbrain,andsubstantiallyimproveourskills.Withagrowthmindset,weemphasizeeffortovertalentorsmarts.Whenwehearthelittlevoiceinourheadssaythingswithafixedmindsetvoicelike,“Iwillfailatthis,andnobodywillrespectme.”Wemusttalkbacktoourselveswithagrowthmindsetvoice,“IfIdon’ttry,Iautomaticallyfail.Where’stherespectinthat.”Then,wechooseagrowthbehavior–takearisk,learn,prepare,workhard,engageindeliberatepracticewithastretchgoal.C1standsforConfidenceConfidenceisbuiltuponagrowthmindset.Confidenceisasenseofbeinglovedandbeingcapable.Whenwebeginfromamindsetthatsays,“IcangetbetteratthisifIlearnandworkhard,”wecanlackconfidenceinacertainskilloracademicsubjectandstillgrowourgrit.Ourinnervoicecansay,“Wow,Ireally…reallystinkatthis,”andstillcomefromagrowthmindset,ifwefollowupwith,“Ineedalotofpracticetogetbetter.”Oneofthemostpowerfulthingswecandotohelpourchildrenandyouthtobuildtheconfidencetheyneedtogrowgritistolisten,justlisten.Letthemfinish.Iftheysaysomethinglike,“Nobodylikesme.”Don’tsay,“That’snottrue.”Definitelydon’tsay,“Well,Ilikeyou.”Wretch-vomit.Insteadsay,“Tellmemore.”MindsetisinfluencedbythecueswegetfromtheEREespeciallyrightafterwemakemistakes.Whenkidsmakemistakes.Letthemknowthatmistakesareexpected.Mistakesarelearningopportunities.Say,“That’sOK.Justhityourresetbutton.Improveyourstrategy,andtryitagain.”Thewholeconceptofgrowthmindsetcouldbeexpressedinasingleword…yet.Thereispowerinthatonelittleword.Whenyouhearyourselforotherssayinafixedmindsetvoice,“Idon’tknow”or“Ican’t.”Talkbacktothemandaskthemtoaddthatsingleword.Don’tsay“Ican’t”say“Ican’t…YET.”WithwhatCarolDweckcallsthe“PowerofYet”wecanhelpkidsbuildtheconfidencetheyneedtogetgritty.C2standsforControlOncewehaveafoundationofgrowthmindset,andweaddtheskillofConfidence–asenseofpersonalpower,wecanusethatConfidencetohelpourselvesandothersdevelopanInnerLocusofControl.

Copyright2017,AllRightsReserved,MikeAshcraft,www.ashcraftafterschool.com

Oneofthemostpowerfulthingswecandotohelpourchildrenandyouthbuildcontrolistoteachthemaboutneuroplasticity.Cutting-edgeneuroscienceteachesusthatthebrainisnotfixed.Throughoutoutentirelives,ourbrainshavetheawesomeabilitytochange,andWEhavecontrolofthis!Neurogenesis,thegrowthofnewbraincellscanhappenthroughenrichment.Braincellsmakenewconnectionstootherbraincellsbasedonexperiences.Neuralnetworksgrownewconnections,strengthenexistingones,andbuildinsulationthatspeedsthetransmissionofelectricimpulses.Growthmindsetresearchhasclearlydemonstratedthatwhenpeoplebelievetheirbrainscangrowanddevelopandthattheyhavecontroloverhowthishappens,theybehavedifferently.Anotherpowerfulthingwecandoisacknowledgetheeffortkidsputintotheprocess.Insteadofsaying,“Seeyouaregoodatmath.”Wesay,“Youreallypracticedsolvingtheseproblems.Itshows.”Insteadof,“Youaresosmart.”Wesay,“Wow,youtriedlotsofstrategiesanddidn’tgiveupuntilyousolvedtheproblem.”Tohelpchildrenandyouthdevelopaninnerlocusofcontrol,weoftenusethe“ForkintheRoadMetaphor.”Wepointoutthatwecanseetheyhaveanimportantchoicetomake.Wepointoutforeseeableandpredictableconsequencestomakingeitherchoice.Thenwebackoff,closeoureyesandcrossourfingers,andletthemmakeaninformeddecision.Greaterawareness,leadstogreaterchoices.Ourkidsarelearningthattheycannotcontroltheirfriends,theycannotcontrolthelikes&dislikesoftheirpeers,&theycannotcontroltheworldaroundthem.Wedon’tneedcontroloverothersinordertodevelopgrit,butwedoneedtofeelincontroloverhowwechoosetorespondtochangingcircumstances.Developinganinner-locusofcontrolhelpsgrowgrit.C3standsforCopingWithagrowthMindset,asenseofConfidence-beingcapableofimprovement,andfeelinganinnersenseofControloverhowwefeelandrespond,wecanlearnskillsthathelpusmanagethehardtimes–Copingskills.Itisaboutdealingwithnegativeemotionsandcircumstances.Thereisoneimmutablelawofhumanexistence–StuffHappens!Copingisaboutlearninghowtodealwhenstuffhappens.Onlyafterchildrengainconfidenceandcontrolcantheybecomecompetentatcopingwithcalmness.Oneofthesinglebestcopingstrategiesishumor.LaughingatthemisfortuneofothersiswhyshowslikeAmerica’sFunniestVideosdosuchagreatjobofcrackingusup.Wemustlearntolaughatourselvesattimes.Wehavetolearntheartoffindingfortuneinmisfortune–tofindtheonegoodthinginabadsituation.Tohelpkidslearncopingskills,wefirstacknowledgethenegativeemotionsorthecrappysituation,thendealwiththesituation.“Thatstinks,now…whatcanwedotoMAKETHEBESTOFIT?”

Copyright2017,AllRightsReserved,MikeAshcraft,www.ashcraftafterschool.com

Tohelpchildrenandyouthdevelopcopingskills,weteachthemcalmingtechniques-breathingtechniquesliketakingaseriesofslowbreathsinthroughtheirnoseandevenslowerbreathsoutthroughtheirmouth.Weteachthemprogressivemusclerelaxationexerciseslikefirsttensingandthenrelaxingtheirmusclesstartingattheirtoesandendingwiththemusclesintheirfaces.Weaskthemtostop,bemindful,andbeaS.T.A.R.–whichmeanstoSmile,TakeBreaths,AndRelax.beforereactingtothesituation.Weknowthelongertheydelaybeforereacting,thelongerofalistofoptionstheycancreate.Themoreoptionstheycancreate,themorelikelytheyaretocomeupwithaneffectiveandappropriateresponse.Wecanhelppeoplechangetheirinnervoicefromafixedtoagrowthvoicebyprovidingthemwithoptimisticself-talkdialog.It’sthekindofstuffthathelpedthelittleblueenginethatcould,toclimbthatmountain,“IthinkIcan,IthinkIcan,IthinkIcan.”Weteachourkidstosaythingslike,“Youcandothis.Slowdown.Justtakeonestepatatime.”Teachingproblem-solvingskillsisapowerfulcopingstrategy.First,askquestionsuntileveryoneunderstandstheproblem.Then,createalonglistofoptions.Next,pickastrategyandputtingitintopractice.Tryitoutandseeifitworks.Andevaluate-ask,“Didthatwork?”“Whatpartdidn’tworksowell?”“Ifyoucouldgobackandtryitagain,whatstrategydoyouthinkyoumightpickthistime?”Grit=Mindset(ConfidenceXControlXCoping).Mindsetgivesustheunderstandingthatwecanlearnandimprovewitheffort.Confidencegivesusthesenseoffeelingcapable.Controlteachesusthatweareincontroloverhowourbrainsgrow,howmucheffortweputintotheprocess,andhowwechoosetobehaveandreacttosituations.Copinghelpsuskeepgoing,bounceback,andsolveproblemswhenstuffhappens.Theseskillsarebuildingblocksnecessaryforpeopletobuildpassionandperseveranceforlong-termgoals=Grit.

References:Duckworth,AngelaLee.(2016).Grit:ThePowerofPassionandPerseverance.NewYork,NY:Scribner.Dweck,Carol,S.(2006).Mindset:TheNewPsychologyofSuccess.NewYork,NY:RandomHouse.